Ayurveda on Relationships: Living in Harmony Through Awareness

That intelligence is within us, and by following the time-tested principles of Ayurveda and paying attention to our own intuition and inner wisdom about what is right for us, we can regulate our lives in harmony with it. RELATIONSHIPS Our life is relationship. We are related to the earth, the moon, the sun, the air we breathe, the water we drink, the food we eat. You are related to your friends, your parents and children, your spouse, and your co-workers, as well as to your own body, your thoughts and feelings, your job, and your bank account.

In our daily life, relationships are most important. Often we use our personal relationships as a sort of power game, to control others. Then relationships become a battlefield rather than a field of love. When a negative emotion comes up in a relationship, such as resentment of a past hurt or insult, anger, fear, anxiety, or criticism, pay attention to the feeling.

Don’t judge the other person or yourself. When your spouse says something and you feel hurt or angry, look inside to see what your thoughts and feelings are saying to you. Out of honesty, clarity comes. When clarity is lacking, feelings are repressed, or communication is absent at times of crisis in our relationships, stress builds up, and this is one of the causes of illness.

Stress disrupts our inner biochemistry, the doshas are thrown out of balance, and the seeds of disease are sown. Husband and wife, brother and sister, parent and child—all our relationships must be absolutely clear. Clarity in relationships develops compassion, and compassion is love. Therefore love is clarity.

And as we all know, love is the key to successful relationships. If you look back over the ten factors presented in this section, you will see that you have a great deal of choice and control over whether they will create a potentially disease- producing imbalance in the doshas. This is true even of such apparently uncontrollable factors as the seasons and the weather: if it is cold, you can dress warmly; if it is hot, you can take it easy and stay out of the sun. How Disease Develops According to Ayurveda, illness is the end result of a long process that can be detected and addressed at any stage.